Dear Constructive Criticism Provider,
I have received your claim of “just trying to help” and trust that you offer yourconstructive criticism with the best of intentions. However, after careful consideration, I must decline your services.
Though I appreciate the opportunity to conduct my affairs in greater alignment with your values, I am afraid my own must take priority at this time.
Please note that while I try to accommodate every petition, requested alterations in employment, residence and relationship status require significant bandwidth to implement.
I am pleased to know you are certain of what you will do if you find yourself in my situation. Indecision can be taxing on the mind and body.
If it is any consolation, I can predict based on our past conversations what yourcriticism will be and can assure you that I have already internalized it and cultivated the appropriate self-doubt.
Director of the Department of Self-Esteem Management
You are receiving this letter because you have submitted a request to the Department of Self-Esteem Management. Please note that appeals will take 3-5 business days to process.